Alice I Have Been

Weekly Goal: Exercise 30 minutes 2x
Sitrep: 20 minute training walk w/Leia

Had a nice weekend. Got to talk with my oldest niece for the second week in a row. I always like that; don't know why I don't call more often. :) I feel bad I got her birthday present to her too late. And just in time for her cell phone to break, making the present moot...Ah well.

Read a good book this weekend. "Alice I Have Been" by Melanie Benjamin. I saw it at the bookstore, and was pleasantly surprised to see it at our library. Picked it up Friday after work and finished it by Saturday evening. When I finished it, I thought to myself "I need to read that again." It was a moving book.

The story is a fictionalized account of the real-life girl that inspired the Lewis Carroll "Alice" books. I usually don't like this type, prefering biographies. But I thought it was a totally fictional book until I got to the afterword. There really was an "Alice" that inspired Carroll. Benjamin took the few known facts of the real Alice's life and spun a pretty good tale. The writing was great, kept me enthralled. It flowed really well. Dare I say it was almost poetic? And the parts of the story that were from the seven and then ten and eleven year old's point of view were crafted nicely. It read like the voice of a child at that age. Thinking, actions, etc.

Note: There are some parts that, while merely alluded too, can be very disturbing. Especially, I would think, to parents.

Overall, I recommend this book. Extremely well written for her first time in historical fiction. I give it an A. I'm planning to look for the contemporary fiction she wrote under another name.


I'm referring to the parts where there is a sexual interest/tension between Carroll and Alice. It's very discreetly written. Nothing substantive happens. But it's disturbing none the less. Especially from Alice's POV. Kept thinking to myself that this was an 11 year old child. How could these thoughts be true? But then again, girls start to develop at that age. The feelings, the confusion, especially when combined with the Victoria upbringing and the emotional distance from her mother, made some sense, I suppose. And the reaction of her parents, especially her mother, blaming her. Well, I guess that fits with the era as well. Women were always the one at fault, regardless of age.

I thought she captured the era superbly. And the jumps in ages didn't bother me at all. The story is in three parts, broken by a picture of Alice at the age of each section. I thought that was a great touch. Different!

Usually I don't like very tragic books. And while Alice certainly suffered, I love how the author wove the tale of her carrying on. It was realistic. And I like how she figured certain things out, understood things, before it was "too late". It was sad, not tragic. Bad things happened, but she moved on, found happiness. Perhaps the best was the resolution of Alice's quest to understand herself. Was she really ever the Alice of the books? If not, who was she? How did it shape who she became? Very nicely done. I might actually buy this one, even if it is hardback.