define: Happiness

Sitrep (11/5-12): 2 wts- 1x Cardio, 1x Arms

I typed define: Happiness in Google this morning. And the results were interesting. The first two listings were definitions. The next ten were video games, albums, and song titles. Type in "happiness" and the first one is a definition. Then it's all about finding or creating happiness.

What brought this on, you ask? Several things.

One, I received the Nov/Dec issue of World Ark magazine (Heifer International). There was an interesting article in it about the pursuit of happiness. The author interviewed several entrepreneurs who left their wealthy, successful careers to do what made them happy. Even if it meant losing everything they'd worked for.

Two, on the phone with Mom & Dad last night we ended up discussing how they just want all their kids to be happy. And they aren’t sure if we are. I'm happy. I can honestly say that. I don’t know when everything just clicked into place for me, or what was the final piece. And I'm not saying everything is perfect. But I can honestly say that I am happy with my life. Is my sister? I think so, at least where her family is concerned. I know she's not passionate about her job; she does it for her daughter. But I'm not passionate about my job, either. Is my brother? I think he and my sister-in-law are happy. They seem so on the phone those rare times we talk. Especially since my brother switched jobs.

Three, after that phone call I ended up talking about the same issue with a friend. Why is it everyone seems so unhappy? We are wealthier than we have ever been, as a nation. Most of us have more than our grandparents ever dreamed of having: huge homes, multiple-car families, iPods, cell phones, computers, stuff, stuff, stuff. Yet from what I read and the “studies” and “surveys” show, we are unhappier than ever. Yes, I know studies and surveys can/are manipulated to show what the researchers/surveyors want.

But I look around me and seem to see nothing but a sea of people that aren't happy or satisfied with their lives. Reminds me of the quote by Thoreau "The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation." (Henry David Thoreau, Walden). The people I see aren't miserable, they're just unhappy. Which to me is worse. When you're miserable it seems there's more of a drive to change your situation. Simple "unhappiness" is brushed aside.

What's the reason we are more unhappy now? Is it the disconnect between people? The ever-increasing pace of our lives? This freaky treadmill we seem to be on where someone keeps punching the “increase speed” button? Is it the emphasis on material well-being? Is it the development of television and then 24 hour news and then the internet? This “always on” society of ours, where there is always noise in the background? [side note - When Noise Annoys]

So why am I happy? What makes now different than times in the past when I wasn’t happy? For me, I think it’s the location, the people I know, my family, my friends. I have my house, I’ve very little debt. And while not rich monetarily, I feel rich mentally, emotionally, physically. And I believe those last ones are tied into the fact that I have taken charge of my health. The last part of my life that wasn’t under my “control.”

But that’s me. Is it different for everyone? Or is it the same? Financial or emotional? What makes you happy? How do you define happiness?

760 is my new favorite number

Goals for week of November 12-18: Cardio 4x, Arms 3x, all with 2 weights

But I'd've been happy with 701! I passed my 3rd exam today in my quest to become an M.CS.A (Mic.ro$oft Certified Systems Administrator). Needed a score of 700, got a score of 760. I have no idea the total number of points I could have gotten. They never tell you that. Idiots. But my prinout shows "Strong" in all of the sections, so I'm happy. I'm thinking of taking the 4th exam before Christmas. Take advantage of the time at my brother's house to study. Since the kids will be in school, we can do our homework together. ;)

This exam was a wee bit different at the end. As soon as I finished the review and hit the "end test" button, I squeezed my eyes shut. Didn't want to see the score right away. After a few minutes (or seconds) I sl-o-w-l-y opened one eye, only to see they've added a "Comments" section, where you can go through and comment on each question on the exam. Yeah, right. So I hit the "end comments" button and poof! There was my score. I think I squeaked, it startled me. I wasn't ready for it. I almost cried when I saw the word "Congratulations!" It took me a few seconds to look for the actual score. ;) Then the door popped open and the 2 ladies at the testing center (whom I know fairly well) came in with my printout and singing "Congratulations to you, Congratulations to you..." They crack me up.

Anyway. On to exam #4!

I think I must be sick...

Weekly goal for Nov. 5-11: 2 weights - 4x Cardio, 3x Arms
End of Week Sitrep: 2 weights - 3x Cardio, 2x Arms

And it's not because of the red wine I had while playing hooky at the neighbors last night instead of studying. Although that is probably why I've had a bit of a headache all day. (I'm such a lightweight. Sigh. Which is why I'd never be able to go on one of the Ops to Bad Frogs. lol. Those ladies scare and amaze me.)

No, I think I must be sick because not only have I found a way to get the BodyRev Bootcamp workout (thank you Janet W!) , I bid on - and won - the Perfect Pushup Travel in the fundraising auctions for Valour IT (Voice Activated Laptops for OUR Injured Troops). Check out the project if you haven't already, it's awesome, and you can still donate!

I'm excited about both workouts. But seriously.

Me?
Pushups?
Bootcamp?
In the same sentence?
And it's voluntary?

Hee hee. Maybe it's because I just finished another 30 minutes of REVing, but I'm feeling seriously giddy here. Although lack of oxygen probably does the same thing. [g]

I missed the second part of the Tyra Banks show last night on body image. Unexpected visit at the neighbors house. With the above mentioned wine. I think she wanted adult company, that wasn't family, ya know? She's got a 2 year old at home and is feeling a little trapped I think. We've chatted lots over the "back fence" since they moved in this summer. I had a good time. I think she did too. By the time I left, she was promising to help with my yard this summer. The flower beds, I mean. She loves planting and knows flowers, etc. (You should have seen all the stuff she planted.) She said she already has plans for my flower beds. LOL. Works for me. It was the one thing I never did get working for me this summer.

Anyway. Just talked to Mom and found out that B&T have a total gym or something like that at their house, so I don't have to take my BodyRev with me when I go visit this December. I'll miss it, but will at least be able to workout. I was having fears of it being a)stolen from my suitcase or b)commandeered at some airport security checkpoint along the way if I did take it as carry on.

Well. Enough of that. I'm feeling great, still Reving, and got 3 cardio and 2 arms workouts in this week. Pretty good even if it's not my goal for the week. But I'm only short one cardio and one arms. I still don't get to buy the newest J.D. Robb, however. But next weekend watch out! I want that book and am feeling motivated enough right now I think I can do it. ;)

Hoo yah!

Body Image

Sitrep (a/o Friday): 2 weights - Cardio 2x, Arms 1x

Thank you Janet W for your call last night. Your timing was perfect because the thought of the new J.D. Robb was not enough to motivate me. I think I'd been sitting here for several hours watching tv and telling myself to REV. :) After getting off the phone I did Cardio and Arms. And am going to do them again tonight. Although I think I must be channeling someone else. Preferring cardio and exercising at night instead of the morning is just not me!

So last night while waiting for the dogs to settle down (I'm dog sitting the boss' dog) I was channel surfing and landed on Tyra Banks. Now, I've never watched this show before but the sight of a group of mostly overweight naked women on the screen stopped me cold. WTF? Was my thought. Turns out they were wearing flesh-colored body suits and doing this little experiment in Body Image. It was brutal. Actually, they were brutal. They stood in front of a mirror and described themselves. Then they stood behind the mirror and the others had to pick a label out of things they'd all said. Like fat, unhealthy, thick, overweight, needs to eat, etc. It was sad. It really was. Because I think all of us have been there. Whether we're in-shape, overweight, too skinny...we're our own worst enemy, we women. We are so cruel to each other.

It was interesting to see them try to avoid giving anyone the worst label there "Fat Slob". It ended up going to one of the women who wasn't fat, but her attitude was pretty nasty. She was the one that had originally uttered the phrase. Her attitude was basically if you're overweight it's because you're a lazy slob. I thought they were going to lynch her. They might yet - part 2 is on tonight. I have to admit I'm intrigued enough that I'm planning on watching it.

And the discussions while picking labels for each other. The whole thing was about being truthful, yet you could see some of them didn't want to be hurtful. And when they talked about giving out the "hot" label...What makes someone hot? The "mean" lady (I can't remember her name) came right out and said you can't be hot if you're overweight. Sigh. People's preceptions are just so...I don't know.

Like the one they gave the label "couch potato". Turns out that yes, she's overweight. But she's no couch potatot. She has been playing baseball for 17 years, eats fairly healthily, is always on the go with her husband...Reminds me of my friend N. back in FL. By no means overweight; she never was. But she is not the typical skinny model. She's bigger boned; she really is. And I've known people that would consider her "thick" (one of the descrips used last night.) Which is absolutely nuts. N. is gorgeous. From head to toe. And very much has the athlete's body. (Even those 2 years when she couldn't be active because she just couldn't seem to keep that one leg in one piece for long.) [g]

Anyway. It was just eye-opening to see these women and hear how they think of themselves. And then to see how they judge each other. Downright cruel. It's not just something we do as youngsters and grow out of. It stays with us. It seems to me the only way to stop it is to stop it at a young age. And yet I worry that I've let my own insecurities and fixation on body and image influence my little sister in a bad way. I'm trying to make it about doing fun stuff together and having energy. Trying to make it about being healthy more than being pretty or fitting that mold that society says we have too. I guess only time will tell how well I do. It's frightening how much impact you can have on someone else, especially someone so young.

Pass It On

Well. Nothing I could even dream of posting today would be better than this one I just read on Crankyotter's blog:

You Don't Have to Whisper

Read it if you haven't. Please. Pass it on. And don't whisper.

http://www.tolerance.org/

My reputation precedes me...

Sitrep: 2 weights - 1x Cardio. Was headed into arms when I got a phone call from a friend having a nervous breakdown. That lasted until 11:30pm. Sigh.

If you missed it the first time, please read It's the Easter Bunny's Fault before reading the rest of today's post. It makes more sense that way.

So I get the following email from a friend this morning:

Natalia, why did I think of you as I read this?? M.

Damn, I can't believe I didn't think of this one! lol

One year at Thanksgiving, my mom went to my sister's house the traditional feast. Knowing how gullible my sister is, my mom decided to play a trick. She told my sister that she needed something from the store.

When my sister left, my mom took the turkey out of the oven, removed the stuffing, stuffed a Cornish hen, and inserted it into the turkey, and re-stuffed the turkey. She then placed the bird(s) back in the oven.

When it was time for dinner, my sister pulled the turkey out of the oven and proceeded to remove the stuffing. When her serving spoon hit something, she reached in and pulled out the little bird.

With a look of total shock on her face, my mother exclaimed, "Patricia, you've cooked a pregnant bird!"

At the reality of this horrifying news, my sister started to cry. It took the family two hours to convince her that turkeys lay eggs!

My reply:

I will never live that down, will I? [g]

Hers:

NOPE :)

A Milestone & I didn't even realize it...

Apparently, my last post was #100. Wow. And when I started this I thought I'd have nothing to say. I'm loving this. Finally, someplace I can mumble and ramble, rant and rave, and get stuff outta my head. And no one else actually has to suffer through it all...unless they want to. This is excellent!

I've been dying to get back here the last few days. Had this wonderful, insightful, thought-provoking post all planned...and the moment is gone. I can't pull it together now that I'm finally able to post again.

Things have been crazy at work. Crazy as in very busy getting caught up from being out of town, and getting two big projects finalized for next week. Also, crazy as in bonuses were handed out and apparently they moved to a merit-based system this year. So some people are seriously ticked off. Not me. But I'm trying to stay under the radar. So I've been reducing my internet time.

Other than that, I have just got to get myself going on my exercise again. I miss it. Not something I thought I'd ever say. I just am so drained by the time I get home I do nothing...except study. I'm feeling more confident about that exam. Still stressed. So my promise to myself and everyone out there is this: Tonight I will complete Arms & Cardio (2 weights).

Also, to encourage/reward myself, I am not allowed to buy the newest J.D. Robb book until I meet my goal for the week: 4x Cardio, 3x Arms, with 2 weights. Note to my Evil Alter Ego Natasha: That means no book until you meet a weekly goal. And the week starts over on November 11th. The idea is to get moving every day. And no, you can't modify the goal downward. :p

Whirlwind

Sitrep: 2 wts- 1x Arms, 1x Cardio; 10 min Bicycle (1.25 miles), 30 min Treadmill (1.4 miles)

Goals (Nov 5-11): 4x Cardio, 3x Arms

Well. Time has passed like a whirlwind since my last post on Thursday. Friday was the last day of our seminar, and the morning was all about getting the exam put together and printed. And of course, the print shop just happened to be a few doors down from Borders. Funny how that happens. Unfortunately, on the way to Borders I was distracted by Cost Plus World Market. Shame on my sister for ever introducing me to that store when I visited her in CA. I blew my spending money in there. Although it's good my car is so small or I'd've bought quite a bit of furniture. They were having a mega sale. For those of you not familiar with World Market, think Pier 1, only more affordable. ;)

I also found new tennis shoes. Yay! And they not only have good arch supports built in, they also have the roll bar (or whatever it's called) to help prevent my feet from rolling in. Haven't worked out with them yet, but boy are they comfy just to wear. They're Asics brand running shoes. The people at Lady Fo.otlo.cker and Fo.otlock.er didn't have a clue what I was talking about. Ended up at Sche.el's. They knew exactly what I wanted, and found me a pair that fit, actually had wide width, and were on sale. I was in and out in 30 minutes. Now that's my kind of shopping!

So. Saturday was driving home time, and the rest of the weekend was spent studying. Have the next exam in my MC.SA certification (Mic.rosof.t Certified Sys.te.ms Adminis.tra.tor) coming up. Was hoping to take it tomorrow (Dad's Bday seemed like a good omen) but am nowhere feeling prepared enough. So it's next week. Monday, most likely. Shanni helped me study yesterday by drilling me with the flashcards I have. Poor kid. M.Soft uses big words for me. She couldn't pronounce half of them, and had to read me the answers on some so I could say if I got them right or not.

Well. I'm outta here. Tons of work to catch up on and I'm wired on too much coffee. That, and Sudafed. Yikes. Can we say I'm all jittery?

Oh! And one of my coworkers is replacing her kitchen cabinets instead of just adding some extras...so she's selling them fairly cheap. I might just get some nice "new" cabinets for my kitchen.

Who is that girl in the mirror, there?

Sitrep: 2 wts- 1x Arms, 1x Cardio; 10 min Bicycle (1.25 miles), 30 min Treadmill (1.4 miles)

Used the hotel's Cardio Room last night. First time I've actively sought out a fitness "center" in about a decade, I think. I still hate the bicycle. Love regular outdoor bicycles, but the stationary ones...they suck big time. [g] Still love the treadmill, though. That was always my "reward". Funny for someone that doesn't like walking. Maybe it's because on the treadmill I get to keep a steady pace and have a beginning and end time. Usually when I'm "walking" it's more of a meandering kind of thing with no real beginning and end or destination in mind. Probably why I hate shopping so much. Surprisingly, I can walk this morning with only a few aches. Although there is this one muscle that runs just behind and sort-of to the left of the knee bend that hurts. That acted up about 6 or 7 minutes into the bicycle workout. Tomorrow I will probably hurt like hell.

The wall in front of all the workout equipment was solid mirrors. Normally I avoid those like the plague. It wasn't too bad when I was on the bicycle. It was a recumbent one (fancy word for sitting with back support, lol) so I couldn't really see myself. But on the treadmill, I got a good look. At least from the waist down. And all of a sudden, I could see me. It was weird. As if some blinders fell off or something. Instead of seeing a fat blob, I saw my hips, curves. Yes, I've lost 20 pounds and toned. Lost some inches, definitely. But that doesn't account for all of it. It's just like I saw myself a bit more clearly. I've heard that the camera adds ten pounds. I think that our eyes add twenty, when we are looking at ourselves.

Why is that? In high school I thought I was unbelievably fat. Yet I wore a size 7 dress to my graduation ceremony. What is up with this? Size 7 is not fat. Fat is 5'2" and 185 pounds. Except now I'm at 165. But still in the obese category according to BMI, etc. Which I think is a crock. Totally does not take into account body structure/type.

But I digress. Most of the time on the treadmill I kept thinking to myself, "Who is that girl in the mirror there..."

Why can't we take these blinders off and just keep them off? What is it that makes us add these pounds to our images? Is it internal? External? Both? Neither? Why are some of us worse off than others in this respect? And now I worry that my new "obsession" of getting into shape is inadvertently making my little sister think negatively about her own body. Yes, she has some baby fat on her, yes she does run a risk of being overweight when you look at her family (both sides.) But I don't want her to obsess on it. So how do I help her? Is this fixation on body image and newly-found exercising mania hurting me too? Do I stop talking about it all together, or keep talking, like I have been.

Are you F'ing Kidding Me?

I guess it's Trick time in Paraguay. I cannot believe this:

Paraguay's Supreme Court has quashed a 10-year prison sentence imposed on the country's ex-army chief, Lino Oviedo, for attempting a coup in 1996. The judges ruled after several military commanders testified last week that there had never been a coup plot.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/7070604.stm

HAH! I was there. There most definitely was something afoot, it's called a COUP ATTEMPT, and Oviedo was Involved. With a capital "I". The embassy was on high alert, Peace Corps was on super-dooper high alert. It was insane and very very scary.

I was in the capital city the night it got really freaky. When it really looked like the tanks were going to roll out into the streets. I was at the Hotel Stella D'Italia with several other PCVs (Peace Corps Volunteers) and this really unfortunate American couple that were passing through on their way to the Falls at Iguacu on the border with Brazil, Paraguay and Argentina. We stayed at the Stella because it was cheap, you could share rooms, and they had CNN International in the lounge. And it was centrally located to downtown Asuncion. Near the palace, government offices and stores. That's where we were, in the lounge at the Stella, switiching from local news coverage to CNN International. The local channels all of a sudden went off the air. All of them. At the same time. We looked at one another and then switched over to CNN. After about 10 minutes the lights in the hotel went out. We looked at each other again and then, all at the same time, yelled out "Coup" and ran for the windows.

PCVs are a strange lot.

You gotta love a hotel that

Sitrep: 2 wts - 1x Arms, 1x Cardio

Serves Starb.ucks coffee in the meeting rooms, and has a Star.bucks in the lobby. :) I know it's not the best coffee in the world, but it's always good, and much much better than what these hotels usually serve.

And holy cow, did I die and end up in VIP heaven? This is the first time we've held one of our seminars here since the hotel was bought by Crow.ne Pla.za. It was nice before but they are doing some major remodeling. And put me in one of the remodeled rooms. I got in and there was this lovely tray with an assortment of bottled water, MT brewed beers and soda in ice. There was a Halloween goodie bag and a note from the sales staff thanking us for coming, etc, and so on...The room is the ultimate, with a panoramic view of the city. Sweet. Sofa, plush bed, three million pillows, one of those luxury showers, LCD/Flat TV (whatever those really pricey TVs are called!, and a coupon for a free movie. This place is nicer than my own home.

The Cro.wne Plaz.a also has this "Sleep Better" thing going. They provide eye mask, lavendar spray for the linens (did not use that - instant migraine!!!), ear plugs and a relaxation CD. I kid you not. The alarm clock plays CD's and you can even plug your MP3 player into it. :) I listened to the CD last night and the first 2 tracks take you through some relaxation "exercises". That doesn't work well for me.. Requires me to concentrate too much to do the exercies; but I liked the music. Apparently at some point in the night I woke up and instead of turning the TV on (I usually put it on timer and fall asleep to it) I must have hit the CD play button. Forgot the 1st two tracks have a guy speaking on it. Scared the heck out of me...thought someone was in the room!

Anyway. I did exercise last night while watching the Bi.ggest Lo.ser. Unfortunately, I ate the candy provided by the hotel. Can't remember the last time I ate La.ffy Ta.ffy. Won't be doing that again. Pure sugar and sat in my stomach like a lump. Ughh. There's a fitness center in the hotel, so I think instead of REVing tonight I'm going to head down there and use some of the equipment. Might as well shake up the routine somewhat. :)

Well. Better go check on the seminar. 59 for the two hour class this a.m. (our largest for this topic ever. Can we say "marketing works?") and then we have 91 signed up for the 2.5 day seminar starting this p.m. That's 16 over projections, and 22 over our break-even point.

The boss actually complimented me on my new haristyle. He is not one to hand out compliments like they're candy, and when he does he is always sincere. He said he really likes the hair, "it's very flattering to your face."

Today is a good day. :)

PS - Ste.phanie Plu.m is a dangerous road companion. Especially when the book involves exploding squirrels and beavers. I think I scared a truck driver or two.

Maleficent

Crankyotter, this one's for you...


It's actually from Halloween 2005 and includes my little sister (right) and her older sister (left).

You can't tell too clearly, but my face is green and I did purple eye shadow in a big way. Tried to copy off the DVD of "Sleep.ing Beau.ty".

I bought the costume off of the internet. It's great. Especially out here - just toss it on over sweater & flannel-line jeans and you are good to go trick-or-treating. (Halloween is usually the first really cold snap of the year. 20 to 30*F for the highs.)

Next year I need to add the staff with the raven. That's harder to find. At least, one that looks real. ;) I'm also thinking of adding long black or purple nails.

The Best Laid Plans...

Sitrep: 2 wts - 1x Arms, 2x Cardio

So...I got no extra workouts in. Actually, I got no more workouts in, period. The friend that has been "ignoring" me extended an olive branch - of sorts - Friday. I ended up going out after work to our old hangout, O'Toole's. Another coworker showed up. It was fun, and I didn't stay too late. But late enough I ate dinner when I got home & crashed. We'll see what happens. She was all "I've missed hanging out with you, thanks for coming," and so on. {me rolling eyes here} Whatever.

Saturday was supposed to be my big "me" day - housecleaning, laundry, working out, studying. Then I remembered I needed to get the oil changed in the car since I have a work-related road trip this week. Then I ended up joining my little & her family for lunch, went shopping with them, and then it was my neighbor's Halloween party. I was "Mal.eficen.t" from Sleeping Be.auty.

Yesterday was Shanni's birthday, so the day was spent at her house. We were supposed to have a "study date" after the party, which started at 2pm. The weather has finally been good enough to burn trash (they live out in the valley) so after cake & ice cream (& presents!) we gathered everything up and started that going. Holy cow was that one heck of a bonfire. Once everything that was to be burned was gathered up and on the fire, the girls and I went inside to get dinner started and study. After maybe fifteen minutes, Shanni quickly disappeared back outside to help put out the fire.

Even though last week was the week she misses 2 days of school to go to the advanced program. Two weeks before these dates, she gets a list of the work she's going to miss. The teachers sign this, and she has to show it to her PEAK teacher. So she has plenty of notice on what she'll have to make up. I stayed inside, helped the older sister get dinner going, and studied for my upcoming computer certification exam.

So she comes back in when it's dinner time. We eat. Talk for a little while, then it's back outside because, oooops, the fire isn't out. It's started back up again (even with the sprinklers on it.) So it was another thirty minutes of spraying it down with the hose. In 40*F weather. Her Mom & I took turns with the hose as our fingers were going numb. That whole time she was in the house goofing off. Sigh. Around 7:30 pm (another half hour later) when I gathered my stuff to go home, she started in on our "study date" and why was I leaving? Hel-lo-oh. It's a 20 minute drive to my place, plus I had to detour to drop her car-less oldest sister off at her place. And I still had to make cornbread for our Halloween Chili Cook-off at work today. She was mad at me. Especially when I told her I got my studying done. ;)

This morning I get a call from her around 9am. Her mother has let her stay home "sick" today because she didn't get her homework done. And she (Shanni) is blaming me for not getting done. "A study date would have helped me." Arghhh. That makes me soooo frustrated. I did not let her get away with that. I told her we did have our study date; I studied, she decided to go play with the fire. "I wasn't playing, it had to be put out." Yeah. Right. Like the 3 adults already out there couldn't put it out? She had no response to that.

I know I'm not Shanni's mother. But Michelle is not doing Shanni any favors by always letting her stay home when her work isn't done. (This happens with some frequency). Shanni has got to learn that deadlines are deadlines, and putting things off so you can "play" is going to have bad consequences. I just feel like shaking her mom. Does she not understand that this is why her 2 oldest children barely made it out of high school, and are struggling now to make livings for themselves? They just eked by, not having to complete assignments, be responsible, etc. And they have that same attitude towards their jobs. They call off work at a whim, aren't dependable, don't want to put any effort into anything. And get upset when they are asked to or get in trouble at work. "My boss doesn't like me."

It's just so frustrating. And I know it's not my place to say anything to Michelle. This is her daughter. I just have to try to set a different example for my little.

Anyway. Enough of my venting. Got a ton of things at work to do today. And tomorrow I'm off to the Big City and - hoo yah - a Barnes & Noble visit is not too far away!!!!

Hope it's not catching...

Sitrep: 2 wts - 1x Arms, 2x Cardio

We've got Lottery Fever - There's a new lottery game in MT. They're only selling 150,000 tickets for a $1million dollar prize, and you can only get the tickets in MT. There are also four drawings for $5k (2 already awarded), five for $10k, and five for $100k. So far only 90,000+ tickets of the total 150k have been sold. :) It's $20 a ticket. But I bought one. Last Friday was such a good day, I was in an awesome mood, things going my way, and thought "why not"? Today our office (full-time staff) bought a ticket together. All I want is that $5k prize. I'll be ecstatic if I just get that. I'm not greedy...

Had some very, very strange dreams last night. Almost what you'd call "fevered" dreams. Night before last I dreamt I was yelling at a coworker because he kept installing G.oo.g.l.e toolbar on our work computers. LOL. But last night. Some of it was work stuff, things I needed to get done today. But the one I really remember, that I remember what I actually felt in the dream, is this one:

I was in a room that looked like my parents house but not. You know what I mean? There were a few other people in the room, and all of a sudden we all collapsed. Then I got back up and had this realization that I was dead but conscious, in my body. Still physically here. I screamed "How can I be dead and alive at the same time" in my head so loud that it partly woke me up. Then in my dream I ran down the hall to my parents room, but they weren't there, then they were; in their beds asleep. I ran to Mom's side of the bed (except in real life it's Dad's side) and woke her up crying. I sat there with my head on the side of the bed crying and asked "how can I be dead and awake?" Last bit I remember before coming fully awake was her waking up and reaching for me. Like she did a million times when I was a kid and crawling into their bed because of a nightmare.

Now if I could just translate this fever to working out. I'm not doing too bad. Plan to REV tonight - Cardio & Arms - and do Cardio plus Arms at least one more time this weekend.

The Hair is short.

Sitrep: 2wts- 1x Arms, 2x Cardio

Will, um, take some time to get used to my hair this way. I must say, it was nice in the shower today. I just need to remember I don't need a handful of shampoo anymore. Basically I got a short shag that should be good with the natural wave in my hair. I have decided to just go with the flow. Basically, the unmanageable wavy thick stuff that is my hair. This "tousled" look should work well. Once I get over the urge to straighten the heck out of every strand. [g] Went for 2 shades of highlights. A blondish one and a caramel one. Some of it looks a little coppery in the sun/light. Which is great. I like it. I really think I'll like the cut too once I get used to it being so short. Even on top.

KT, my little's older sister, went with me to get her hair done. It looks wonderfully "chic" as she put it. I like it. She is too pretty to start with, lol, now she has a cool do. We need some kind of guy barrier to put around her. ;) Anyway. We picked Shanni up after school and got a snack, then spent several hours at Hasting's. [g] Love an afternoon in the bookstore when everyone else is at work. It feels so sneaky. We stayed there until called home by their Mom. We didn't even tell her we were there, and the first thing she said was "Okay, it's time to leave Hasting's. It's Shanni's turn to cook dinner."

When we got our snack at McD's, the guy behind the counter was flirting with me. Or that's what the girls said. I was totally oblivious. Even the free french fries didn't clue me in. I didn't even realize he hadn't charged us for them. Until he came over and pointed it out later, while we were waiting for our order, saying he didn't want me to think I was getting "over-charged" the next time I ordered the same thing. Boy did the girls tease me about that. Especially Shanni. They even had to bring it up over dinner at their house.

Then later that evening Shanni started teasing her sister about guys, and I started teasing her about the two guys she was "flirting" with after school when I drove up. And the friend of her older brother that was actually at the house last night. She was trying to flirt with him, but is at that stage she doesn't realize what she's doing and doesn't quite know how...Well, she got upset and started to stomp off, until I said "Hey, you're the one that was trying to marry me off to the guy working at McDonald's!" She tried to pretend she was still mad, but I could see her fighting that smile. And then her Mom grabbed her in a hug and started singing "Is this the little girl I carried." Shanni starts struggling to get away at this point, and Michelle keeps on singing "I don't remember growing older. When did she?" [Sunrise, Sunset from Fiddler On The Roof] . I've never seen teenagers clear a room that fast. ;)

Quick, Pass the Ibuprofen

1x Arms, 1x Cardio - 2 weights for both

I really hit the cardio hard last night. Trying to make up for not REVing or burning off excess energy. Not sure which. I added a second weight on the cardio. Ughhh on the REVs is all I can say. Then I did extra reps. I so feel it today. Was fine when I woke up. But the more I move, the stiffer I feel. [g]

Not sure what was up with me last night, but hey...it's better than bingeing on ice cream or chocolates! (Which I have a nice box of thanks to my lovely sister. She sent me a box of Chocolate Covered Macadamia Nuts from Hawaii. Souvenir for me of their vacation in Kuai this month! They were good, but I will admit to sharing them with my coworkers so I wouldn't eat the whole box myself.)

I've heard that exercising right before bed is not a good idea; it keeps you awake. Maybe I'm just weird, but if I exercise and go to bed within a half hour to an hour, I sleep wonderfully. It feels so good to slip between the sheets after working out and just crashing. [g] I did sleep much better last night than I have in weeks. I'm still exhausted this morning. But that's because I haven't slept well in awhile. And then I dreamt. Do you ever have those dreams that are so good and so real, they stick with you all day?

I'm seriously bummed this morning. I wish I was back in my last dream. (I remember several from last night. The final one was the good one. The other one was weird - world was flooded, we held onto the continents as they flipped over under the weight of the water. And it went in turns. We had to sit there and wait and watch as the other continents and their people flipped and then were on dry land. Until it was our turn. Absolutely bizarre. I'm still puzzling over what that one means.)

Still have no idea what to do with my hair. Spent way too much time yesterday trying to figure out if my face is "round" or "square" or "oval". Sheesh. 12:30 is the appointment. I'll see about posting a picture tomorrow. If it isn't too scary. [g]

Danger Ahead: Entering Girl Territory

Sitrep: Does putting on my exercise clothes count as improvement?

"Are you going to be okay, or do you need psychiatric help?" [g] My boss said that to our C.O.O. this morning. Just about choked on my hot chocolate. Our COO was late to work, and was spinning an amusing story about nothing going right this morning. From shoes she couldn't buckle, to not being able to find matching earrings, to getting so entralled in news coverage of the CA fires she lost track of time. He said that with such a straight face, too. It's good to see him making jokes again.

Soooooo. I'm in the mood to do something "wild" and "reckless". Not quite itchy feet; I don't get those any more. Not since moving to Montana. But I feel this need to shake things up a bit. I've learned to humor myself in these moods and do something. Otherwise it builds and builds and then I end up doing something drastic. Like joining the Peace Corps. So what else is a woman to do when she needs a change? Why, get her hair done, of course. ;) Tomorrow afternoon I'm heading to my hairdresser. I'm scheduled for a cut and highlights. Have no idea what I'm going to have done.

Right now my hair is about 3 inches past the shoulders; at the shoulder blades. I always wear it up in a clip. Looks dowdy. Frumpy. Old. I want something young and stylish. Except it must be easy to maintain. I'm lazy in the mornings. No major primping for me. Do I cut it short? Medium length? Layers? Spikes? [g] What color highlights should I get? Blonde? But that's so...boring. Red? I like red. I used to have reddish highlights. Until the gray started showing. I was a total redhead for several years. And I do mean red. Along with a short hair cut. It looked good. But that was a decade ago and I was much skinnier. What to do, what to do. Maybe I should add purple highlights. My niece did that recently. So did my little sister. Do you think that would be too "hip" for work? [g] I could just go completely blonde. Hmmmm.

I don't know. I simply want something different than my usual just-above-shoulder-length slightly layered hair with bangs. Sigh. I think tomorrow is going to be dangerous. I need a sign that reads Danger Ahead: Entering Girl Territory

Leaving on a jet plane...

Whoo-hoo! Bought my ticket and will be winging my way east come December 1! I'm so excited I can hardly sit still. It's been too long since I've seen my brother, sister-in-law, nieces & nephew. Two years! And that was just for a few days at our aunt's funeral. So. This is going to be 2 weeks of fun!

I got the ticket for $309. What a steal that is. :) Half of what it usually costs. Even better, our "chief operating officer" (don't you just love fancy titles in small offices?) just told me that we're getting bonuses this year after all. And mine will cover the cost of the airfare plus spending money!

Life is really good today. Would I be pushing my luck if I bought a lottery ticket?????

The Nuts & Bolts of Life

Sitrep: 1x Arms, 1x Cardio
Okay, last week was lousy as far as exercise goes. I will do better this week, because that's my pattern. [g] Hit it hard for 2-3 weeks, slack for 1-2, hit it hard again...

It looks like I'll be going to visit my brother and his family in the next few months. I've been talking about doing this for years. Literally. I haven't seem him or my sister-in-law or their kids since Aunt Nina's funeral 2? 3? years ago. (I'm muddled on the dates. Have a hard enough time remembering today!) My brother called last night and I had a great time talking with him and my SIL. And my oldest niece. Who ordered me to come visit in the next two weeks. [g] They call me Tia Fun and the Fun Aunt. LOL. It soooo helps to be only one on our side with no kids, and there are no aunts/uncles on their Mom's side. ;) Kinda a built-in advantage for me! If I cash in some of my airline miles, I can get a round trip for about $300. A miracle. Usually costs $600+ to get in/out of Montana! I'm aiming for early December. Weather should be okay, and hopefully not too many travelers.

Update on the ears: No ear infection. Just regular sinus pressure. Which I ignored last time and it was an ear infection. I can't win! But the rupture has healed, no damage, & I can hear perfectly. :) Just need to keep taking Sudafed as needed. So after my doctor visit, I had the rest of the afternoon off. I picked up a few pizzas, the dog, and headed for my little sister's house. I knew the girls were home - no school. As I turned onto their street I called on the cell and told them to look out the front window...when I saw them waving from the window, I said to them "Who wants to go driving?" They came screaming out the front door. It was hilarious. Their mom drove up just as I was walking up to the house. She'd gotten off work early and brought home, you guessed it, PIZZA! LOL.

I took KT, Shanni's 17 year old sister, driving in my car. They have a graduated licensing system here and she has to get in so many hours. She also wants to learn how to drive a manual/stick shift. I've been promising her forever. They live out in the valley, so we had the dirt/back roads to ourselves. No traffic. She did great! Took to shifting like a duck takes to water. A bit of an issue remembering to use the clutch when starting, stopping...Some very jerky starts/stops. [g] But she did great overall. Which I told her. I did great too! I only found myself jamming my foot through the floor twice. ;)

Saturday Shanni & I started our big art project. Ben Franklin Crafts had all the stuff to make your own "communication center" on sale. 12" x 12" tiles of your choice: magnet, chalkboard, cork, white erase board. You glue them to foam, put in a frame, decorate. It was fun, the store was crazy packed with people. I guess it was a good sale! We got halfway done. Need to decorate them next weekend.

Yesterday I found my missing sheets & towels. Could not figure out where they were. They disappeared in the last move. Well, I guess I used them to wrap the paintings I haven't hung yet. Got those out of the huge box they were stored in and there were all the sheets and towels. So I had to do multiple extra loads of laundry. [g] Got the paintings out of the frames (old, not my style) and hung them on the wall. Living room looks better now! Eventually I'll get them framed. Once I figure out what I want. They're the paintings done by my parents.

Other than that I was lazy yesterday. Slept, watched TV. That's about it. It was a good "family" type weekend. Family really is the Nuts & Bolts of life. They keep everything held together. Even if they do get rusty or squeaky every once in awhile. ;)

My ears have regressed to childhood

Sitrep: 1x Arms, 1x Cardio

My ears are hurting. Again. What am I, a little kid? Do I need tubes in my ears or what? Sigh. I probably should have gone back to the doc after finishing that last round of antibiotics, but was feeling fine. Could finally hear again, no pain, no pressure. Well, except for that day last week when I, uh, tried to use the Neil Med Sinus Rinse recommended to me by Cranky Otter.

Ideally, I can see how this would provide benefits. I read the instructions a few times; it's not that complicated. Had to wait for the boiled water to cool enough so I wouldn't scald the insides of my face. (Gee, there's a lovely thought!) I wasn't so thrilled about shooting a water/medicated solution up one nostril for it to come out the other, but okay, I was willing to give it a try. It's helped so many others...

Warning: The following might be TMI, so beware! :)

I neglected to think about one thing: coordination. I'm, uh, not exactly the most coordinated person. There's a reason I've been laughingly called "Grace". I can twist my ankle standing still, and am so used to bumping into walls, etc, that without the various bruises/scrapes to remind me, I'd never know it happened. The one time I tried water-skiing, I ended up with rope burns on top of bruises on the insides of my thighs.

Using the sinus rinse requires doing the following at the same time:

1) keep your mouth open
2) breathe
3) squeeze solution into your nostril
4) lean over sink
5) pay attention to how much you've squeezed into your nose

And, oh, yeah, don't swallow the solution.

Who'd've thought it'd be that difficult to do? I swear - cross my heart and hope to die, stick a needle in my eye - that I snorted and hacked and made so many weird noises because I kept forgetting to breathe and then when I did breathe I'd start to swallow the stuff and then try to not swallow it, that the dog hid under the bed. And I mean under the bed in the middle where you can't reach her. (Normally her tail sticks out but not this time.) It was a half hour after I'd left the bathroom before she came back out to the living room. I'm not sure if she was scared of the noises, or just making sure I couldn't make her go next.

And then there was the unfortunate fact that I have a partially deviated septum. Meaning, at some point in time my nose was broken, per the ENT I saw in Florida. (Quack). I've never had a broken nose, so I musta been born with it. So the left side is smaller than the right. And my Eustachian tubes are small, so...I have ear problems. Well, I guess my E. tubes are just too small, or the one to the left ear (the one that had the worst of the ear infection) wasn't quite healed up yet. Because when I squeezed the solution up the left nostril, nothing came out the right. So I squeezed the bottle harder, thinking (can you believe I actually have a college degree?) that maybe nothing was getting into my nose. Riiiiight.

That's when I started to feel it pooling in my ear. For those of you that have never had fluid build up in your ears, let me just say it's not the most pleasant feeling. Not the worst, but not the best, either. And when it's all swooshing in there all at once...it's the freakiest sensation. It also feels a bit like what my BIL calls the "Oh-no" second. You've been there. It's like that second when the front door clicks shut behind you, right as you realize the keys are in the house. I looked at myself in the mirror, called myself a few choice names, and that was that for the Sinus Rinse. I took a double dose of Sudafed to get my ear to drain. I thought it had. Didn't bother me after a day or so.

But Wednesday of this week my right ear started hurting again. Just a little bit, just enough to wake me up at night and reach for the heating pad. (There's a reason the thing is always plugged in and hanging on the headboard.) It was fine when I got up. Same thing happened yesterday morning. I brushed it off to the change in the weather. I can usually feel when a front is moving through. Except now it's been hurting constantly since yesterday evening. And I've scheduled another visit to the doctor. Why does this only happen after they change health insurance plans and I now have a $500 deductible? It's gotta be one of Murphy's laws...

So this afternoon I'm off to the doctor. Yay. :( There goes another $80 down the drain. But at least I get to leave work a few hours early!

It's funny the things we think about

Sitrep: 1x Arms, 1x Cardio
Yay! I'm REVing again. :)

When I was 9 or 10 years old, while Dad was stationed in Germany, we went on vacation to Holland and Amsterdam. I don't remember much about the trip, it was so long ago. But I do remember 2 parts vividly: the shoe carving factory where we got our own shoes with our names engraved on them, and our visit to the Anne Frank House.

At the time I had, if anything, a vague knowledge of WWII and the holocaust. I'm not sure I even knew who Anne Frank was. I remember being intrigued that a girl, just a few years older than me, and her family lived up there for so long. Hidden away in fear for their lives. The secret stairs behind the bookcase were so tiny and steep and narrow. I remember thinking that, even though at that age I was pretty tiny myself. And once upstairs in the secret annex, it seemed so small and cramped. To this day I'm not sure of the exact size & space...there were so many people on the tour it seemed the rooms were packed. Those are my memories of the trip.

Being a voracious reader already, I asked my parents to get me a copy of Anne Frank's diary from the gift shop. Which they did. And I read it. Was it too early an age to read the book? I don't know. Realistically it's probably what started my interest in WWII and the Holocaust and history in general. But the ending haunted me. Saddened me. Frustrated me. And many years later would leave me feeling sort of betrayed (for reasons I'll get too). I would turn time and again to those last pages that reported what happened after the families were turned over to the Nazis. Especially the few short paragraphs that "described" what happened to the girls. It told how the family was separated, how their mother died, where the girls ended up, and how they died of typhoid in their beds just days before the camp was liberated. (I remember one of the girls died from falling out of her bed trying to get water for the sister). It made it sound so...humane. So...clean. I was haunted by the unfairness of dying just days before liberation, of their parents dying too, of the whole thing. I'd re-write the ending in my head as I went to sleep or just while daydreaming.

Once I really got into the history and horror of the concentration camps (we also went to Dachau on another vacation), it started to bother me, that portrayal of the girls' deaths. It seemed a rather peaceful way to go, which was nothing like what I was learning. But I never really thought about it. Even when I heard that her father had edited out parts unfavorable to the mother, etc. It wasn't until a few years ago that I really and truly realized the depth of the deception at the end of that book, when I watched the 2001 movie Anne Frank, The Whole Story. The stark, brutal inhumanity of the concentration camps...

Even though I was an adult and knew it couldn't have been that way, I just felt so lied to by the book. How could they have done that? Was it for Otto Frank's sanity? Did he need to believe that's how his girls died? Was it not known, really, how bad that it was? The details, the deception, were not needed. They could have just said that the girls died at Bergen-Belsen.

Anyway. Not sure where this came from, but I was thinking about it when I got up this morning. Bizarre. I'd like to read the diary again, but am hesitant for fear I'll have some other childhood illusion/impression shattered. And there are so many editions now, when I looked into it I couldn't figure out which one had the most of her actual diary with the least amount of editing.

It's funny, isn't it, the things we remember, what makes an impression.

According to Earl

I don't have a cat, but I have plenty of friends that do. So I've heard the stories; even seen a few incidents with my own eyes (there was this living room where it looked like several hundred birds had exploded - the feathers, my god, the feathers!) But I seriously feel today like something the cat dragged in. No, not just dragged in. Something the cat dragged in alive and proceeded to toss around the room and fervently abuse, torment and thrash for several hours. That's how I feel today.

Gee, see what a little milk in my diet, no exercise, lack of sleep, 4 nights of vivid dreams & an insanely busy day at work will do to me? Next time I crave Frosted Mini-Wheats I'm gonna say no.

So I finally got around to trying to fix the broken handle to the gas heater for the "back" half of the house. (Hah...laundry/sun porch & kitchen). Some of you may recall how I broke it several weeks back using a hammer to ahhh, finesse, it open. Haven't a clue who to get to fix it. It's not like "broken gas valves" are actually listed in the yellow pages. Soooo....I called my energy company. I also asked how to shut off the gas so the work can be done. I can't find a shutoff valve in the basement. So. I get this call from the energy company tech. He wants to know if I'm at the house. I say no, but I can be in about 15 minutes. He wants me to get there faster. I go, well, I'm in "H" and the house is in "E.H." It takes about 15 minutes to drive there....Then he starts asking me what I need, etc. So I explain what work I need done. He's quiet, and then he says "You the lady that was doing all that remodeling?" I say yes. He goes. "I'm the same guy as before. You're just getting around to replacing the heat?" Now, I can understand his surprise - the last time he was at my house the only heat source was the defunct monstrosity in the living room, that he helped disconnect. After he fixed the gas leak caused by us moving the oven. And that was just the first day in the house.

So now I have to explain that I did get heaters put in, only I've broken the shut-off/turn-on valve to one of them and can't light the pilot because I can't turn the gas on. He was really quiet. Then he goes "you are hiring someone to do this repair, right?" Umm, sort-of. A friend's going to do it for me. Big sigh from him. Then he tells me there is no shut-off in the house. He has to turn the gas off at the meter. Then he'll come back and turn it on when we're done, and light all the appliances. [Should I tell him I've been lighting them myself this whole time? blink, blink]

So I ask him what hours I can do that during. He's quiet again. [Geez, do I really sound that stupid?] Then he asks, "When you plannin' on doin' this?" Umm, in the evening? Saturday maybe? No response. So then I said "Look, just tell me during what hours I can make the request to turn on/off the gas, and I'll get it done during that time, okay?" He laughed. And sighed when I asked him what his name is. It's Earl. I now know the power/gas company technician. And he not only knows me, he thinks I'm a complete idiot. I think I scare him. But that's okay. Sometimes I think I scare myself. ;)

A Portrait of Me

Sitrep: Zero anything. It's beyond frustrating. Worked late both the last 2 nights. Will again tonight. Sleeping horribly. Can't seem to get up early. Actually, having trouble getting up at all!

This is me today

The Big Read Under the Big Sky

Sitrep: 1x Arms (2wts), 1x Cardio, 1x Abs, 1x Walk (10min), 15 min Stretching/Qigong, 30 min Yard work (mowing, weeding)

Saturday was a great day. One of those crisp fall days full of sunshine when you just want to be outside. Perfect for the annual Festival of the Book done by our local library. This year they are taking part in "The Big Read", an initiative of the National Endowment for the Arts in partnership with the Institute of Museum and Library Services and Arts Midwest. The book picked for our county just happens to be one of my absolute favorites, To Kill A Mockingbird.

The opening events were in one of the parks next to the library. I took my little sister Shanni and her older sister KT. I can't believe how excited they were! They must have called me several times Friday night, even after we'd made all the arrangements. Shanni was so concerned we wouldn't get there in time to get our free copies of the book. [g] (I had them listening to it in the car with me this summer when we did our 2 trips to Bozeman.) The library had 2000 copies to give out. There were actually quite a few people getting them, too.

It was a great event. All sorts of booths were set up, there was music and dancing. One of the local dance troupes did some Irish Dancing. There was Native American drumming and chanting. They even had chairs and drumming sticks (I have no idea if that's what they're called; know nothing about drumming!) set out for anyone who wanted to to join in. Shanni loves drumming, so she jumped right in. After a few seconds I sat down too. It was captivating, the rhythm of the chanting and the drum beats. I can see how easy it would be to slip into a trance-like state. Very good meditation! Except my arm got very tired after a few minutes. Guess I should have done all my Arms workouts last week!

We also got to sit in the driver's seat of a police car and have one of the officer's show us all the gadgets. Even KT, who's not as much of a geek as Shanni & I, was interested. Until Shanni flashed us in the eyes with the spotlight trying to rotate it to the front of the car. Yikes. But it was very cool to see how all that stuff works. I had no idea how much of a drain all those on-board computers are for the car batteries. The officer was telling us they had to install those remote jump starters (or whatever they're called) to actually start the engine sometimes. If he were to shut the car off but have the computer and cameras up and running, it would drain the battery almost completely in ten minutes! Yikes. Maybe it's because the technology is newer for our small town. He said they're still looking into battery options, etc. I was amazed at the quality of the camera system. There's an on board hard drive that it goes to. If they need to keep it, they pull the hard drive, take it to the station and burn it onto disc. Wow. No more grainy b&W VHS! Anyway, he was very nice and patient with all of Shanni's questions. Which is not something I can always say about myself!

Then, of course, we spent several hours in the library itself, just browsing. We ran into Shanni's English teacher, and Shanni was so proud to introduce me. Ah, I remember those days! Shanni also got her own library card. She checked her books out before the rest of us were even done browsing! Since it was so nice out, and was lunch time, we decided to stroll the walking mall and ended up at The Parrot Confectionery (a landmark around here since 1919) for lunch. Not a bad place to go. A bowl of Campbell's soup, and a small sundae for $4.50 is a pretty decent lunch. It's a fun place to hang out; old-fashioned booths and jukebox, collection of elephant statues and other miscellaneous stuff decorating the walls. And, of course, there's the inevitable noses-pressed-to-the-glass at the candy/chocolate counter. ;)

We spent the rest of the afternoon strolling up & down the rest of the Walking Mall, & Last Chance Gulch, which is one of those typical small town "down town" streets. Went into the Antique Mall, which is always fun to browse. The girls had so much fun trying on the old hats...And no trip downtown is complete without a stop in Aunt Bonnie's bookstore, one of our two used book stores. Alas, the lady working that day was burning way too much incense, and I could only stay around ten minutes. Ended up with a low-grade headache. Sigh. Usually it's not so bad in the store. I've been able in the past to stay a half hour and more.

And that was our Saturday. It was just a fun day all around. :)

Yesterday was a lazy day. Did laundry, some housework. No REVing. Sigh. But I did weed along the side of the house (that stuff was 12" high already!), and mowed the yard. Hopefully for the last time until Spring. :) We've had a lot of rain lately, and unseasonably warm temps, so who knows. I might be mowing until Christmas at this rate!

In the evening, I was channel-surfing and ended up finding "Legally Blonde, The Musical" on MTV. It was great! I like Broadway musicals anyway, but this was just fun all around. I wish I'd caught it at the beginning, but missed about a half hour or so. I had a silly grin on my face through most of it. I hope they sell it on DVD. They don't do that enough, in my opinion. (Like when PBS showed "The Light in the Piazza" on Live from Lincoln Center. They still haven't issued that on DVD.) I'm definitely going to add "Legally Blonde, The Musical" to my CD collection. What a find! Who'd've thought a Broadway Musical would be shown on MTV? I must see if they're going to re-run it.

On Personal Responsibility

Sitrep: 1x Arms (2wts), 1x Cardio, 1x Abs, 1x Walk (10min), 15 min Stretching/Qigong

There's been an interesting discussion on the bulletin board today. It was sparked by a news article that CA has banned smoking in cars with children in them.

I haven't really gotten into the discussion because I've been thinking about it all day. I'm less and less inclined to support government mandates restricting personal actions. It seems to me that the more our government, whether it begins on the state level and moves national, or vice versa, tells us what we can do, the less personal responsibility we take for our own actions. We become more and more childlike, emotional, and out of control.

The ban on smoking seemed harmless enough to me. Yes, it causes cancer. Yes, it's a disgusing, foul smelling habit (in my opinion!). But what right do I have to tell someone that they can't smoke? What right does anyone have to tell anyone else that? Yes, second-hand smoke causes cancer. There are many things that cause cancer. We can't ban them all. Do I think there should be some restrictions? Yes. I firmly believe we should educate on the dangers of smoking. Have smoke-free environments. But not total bans.

And then to move that ban into someone's personal space like their car. It will be their home next. And no, I'm not getting all Orwellian. It's going to happen "for the good of the children". It's the phrase that wells emotions, that gets people to agree. It's not a far step from the car to the house. And then where? Obesity will be next. After all, smoking was contributing to the rising cost of health care. [Which keeps rising, by the way, even though the numbers of people smoking has decreased as dramatically as the costs of health care have been going up.] How do we get people to stop being fat? Why, we fine them if they feed their children the "wrong" kinds of food. Then it will move to everyone, not just children. There will be sin taxes on fast food, junk food, etc., just like on alcohol and smoking. Television, cable, computers, games, books...all will be regulated so we don't spend too much time sitting and getting fat. How about government mandated exercise periods?

And after we tackle that? What bad habit will we need to be saved from then? How about our decaying morals. "For the good of the children" they need to be taught the right morals. The only way (in a lot of people's minds) to have morals is to go to church. And by church, in my experience, they are usually referring to Christianity.

We are already on the slippery slope of the government "saving us from ourselves". We are ceding control over the most fundamental of things - how we live our lives, how we raise our children - to the government. To other people.

When did personal responsibility, common sense and individual liberty give way to the supremacy of society's rights and governmental regulation?

"I would rather be exposed to the inconveniencies attending too much liberty than those attending too small a degree of it."
THOMAS JEFFERSON, letter to Archibald Stuart, December 23, 1791.—The Writings of Thomas Jefferson, ed. Paul L. Ford, vol. 5, p. 409 (1895).

"The true danger is when liberty is nibbled away, for expedients, and by parts."
EDMUND BURKE, letter to the Sheriffs of Bristol, April 3, 1777.—The Works of the Right Honorable Edmund Burke, vol. 2, p. 199 (1899).

Some quotes from John Stuart Mill's "On Liberty" (which I find to be fascinating reading, and available online):

"But in each person’s own concerns, his individual spontaneity is entitled to free exercise. Considerations to aid his judgment, exhortations to strengthen his will, may be offered to him, even obtruded on him, by others; but he, himself, is the final judge. All errors which he is likely to commit against advice and warning, are far outweighed by the evil of allowing others to constrain him to what they deem his good." Mill, John Stuart. On Liberty. Vol. XXV, Part 2. The Harvard Classics. New York: P.F. Collier & Son, 1909–14; Bartleby.com, 2001.

"A theory of “social rights,” the like of which probably never before found its way into distinct language—being nothing short of this—that it is the absolute social right of every individual, that every other individual shall act in every respect exactly as he ought; that whosoever fails thereof in the smallest particular, violates my social right, and entitles me to demand from the legislature the removal of the grievance. So monstrous a principle is far more dangerous than any single interference with liberty; there is no violation of liberty which it would not justify; it acknowledges no right to any freedom whatever, except perhaps to that of holding opinions in secret, without ever disclosing them; for the moment an opinion which I consider noxious, passes any one’s lips, it invades all the “social rights” attributed to me... "
Mill, John Stuart. On Liberty. Vol. XXV, Part 2. The Harvard Classics. New York: P.F. Collier & Son, 1909–14; Bartleby.com, 2001.

Putting on my thinking cap...

Sitrep: 1x Arms (2wts), 1x Cardio, 1x Abs, 15 min Stretching

I'm sure it's not news to anybody that we're full-swing into a presidential election cycle. It's dominating everything, unfortunately. And me being me, I keep following all this political stuff. What's even more interesting is that Shanni is starting to pay attention (partly my fault!) and learn about this kind of stuff in social studies.

And I'm starting to hear the refrain I used to say myself "If you don't vote, you can't complain." Like I wrote, I used to hold that belief myself. Until I got disillusioned with the whole system from the top down, and couldn't bear to vote at all. Which made me think; why can't I complain if I don't vote? It's hard to see where my vote counts or makes a difference. I'm given an either or choice. Especially in the presidential vote, where the primary system makes my voice moot. The candidates are selected by a small section of the population. Giving me that either or. And if neither of those are my choice, my vote doesn't count. There's no official "none of the above" vote. They only count for or against those candidates listed. And the actual costs to me to go and vote are not taken into account either. They may be small in the grand scheme of things, but they are large to me. My time is precious, and my free time is even more so since it is as limited as it is.

I'm starting to get over my disillusionment. At least, to the point where I am willing to take part in the process again, and hopefully, someday, things may be different. And I won't feel so marginalized.

I've been doing research on the candidates and the issues, and get so frustrated at my own lack of knowledge/understanding on our political system. The whole primary selection process in particular. I just don't remember much talk on that in school. Maybe there was. I found some interesting articles on the primary system, it's benefits and drawbacks, and some potential negative consequences of the current "front-loading" of the presidential primaries, an article on voting itself, and some ideas for election reform.

Is it rational to vote?
http://www.thisnation.com/question/052.html

America’s Hit or Miss Primary System
http://www.realclearpolitics.com/articles/2007/03/americas_hit_or_miss_primary_s.html

Racing to the Start
http://hprsite.squarespace.com/racing-to-the-start-052007/

Election Reform
http://www.opportunity08.org/Files/FD.ashx?guid=e98dbebb-3843-4364-b62d-d71a9bb61dbc

In addition, I've been thinking a lot about what the founders of the US would think/say. I've always been interested in history, etc, and done reading on it. [As my Aunt Nina said to me during my last Christmas visit 3 or 4 years ago, only I would bring a book called "Declarations of Independence: Cross-examining American Ideology" to read on vacation. She was half-admiring, half-amused, I think.]

For a long time I've wanted to read the Federalist Papers. But it wasn't until recently that my interest really got piqued to read them along with the Anti-Federalist papers. Because I've realized that somewhere along the line in the last 10 years, I've moved away from a "Federalist" position to a more "Anti-Federalist" one. Meaning less power to the central government, more to the individual states. It was a bit of a shock to me to realize that. So I have moved those up on my TBR list. Actually, moved it to the top.

Someone told me recently that I've turned into a Libertarian. A Moderate Libertarian, but a Libertarian nontheless. I'm not sure how I feel about that. Or how true it is. But anyway. I digress. In my quest to learn more about the development of the constitution and the laws and beliefs that our country was founded on and supposedly still professes, I stumbled across the a website called This Nation.

There are some great links on their site, especially their library page. You can access Historical Documents, Executive Orders, War Messages, Foreign Policy Statements, Inaugural Addresses, State of the Union Addresses, Public Laws & Resolutions, Political Essays & Speeches, Supreme Court Decisions, Treaties Pacts & Agreements, Constitutions of Other Nations, and several free e-books. Such as the Federalist & Anti-Federalist papers.

http://www.thisnation.com/library/

I know this is probably of little interest to a lot of people out there. But consider this my little attempt to share some of my excitement and passion for history and politics and learning. I'm a sucker for learning. If I could, I'd be a perpetual student.

Oh. My. God. Moment Last Night (Get Y'all's minds out of the gutter!)

Sitrep: 1x Arms, 1x Cardio
(I love Tuesdays. Watching Biggest Loser motivates me to get off my butt and workout while I'm watching the show)

So last night I got this really brilliant idea after REVing for 30 minutes that I really needed to take my measurements again. After all, I'm back at 165. Let's see how that little side-trip back up to 171 affected the numbers.

Caveat: I'm not really sure of the numbers in this chart. It's hard to measure yourself, and I'm not certain I measured in all the right spots, or even the same spots each time. (particularly forearm, any of the upper/lower, etc.) Sad, really.

Anyway. I was a bit bummed yet again on looking at the numbers. Nothing has really changed all that much...

But I've lost 20 pounds (hoo-yah) and dropped from a definite size 16 in everything to a 12/14 (and now my 14 jeans are a bit loose around the waist/hips and the size 12 slacks are comfy again.) And my shirts are looser. Larges I stopped wearing are fitting better.

I think if I went shopping today, I'd end up with a pair of size 12 jeans. I think. Not ready to test that theory. [g]

Anyway. I was sitting there bummed out, especially when looking at the waist/belly numbers. So on a whim I put the measuring tape around my waist again, only this time I put it at my original measurement. Oh. My. God. What a difference!!!!! And was I really that fat? Oh. My. God.

I think I'm going to start worshipping at the altar of BodyRev and Alden Mills. With Swim Buddies and the Gator Patrol in my pantheon of deities. :)

Running on Empty

Sitrep: Nothing. Nada. Zilch. Crashed and burned...

It seems I'm full of questions, yet empty of answers. So today is going to be my "Why..." day. Maybe I should do this monthly? It might be good for me!>

Why is the US government debating whether or not to label the deaths of Armenians in Turkey in 1915-17 genocide when genocide is currently taking place in various places around the world yet we aren't doing much of anything to stop it? http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/7035597.stm

Why is it okay to debate after the fact, but stand idly by during? (The Holocaust, Rwanda, Darfur, come to mind.)

Why do people get so upset and have such heartburn over Spanish being spoken routinely in this country, or having signs and directions and instructions in multiple languages, that we have to consider a law to make English the national language? I'm fairly well-traveled, and even in the freakin' backwater places of South America I've been to there have been multi-lingual signs. And many people speaking, gasp, English.

Why is it that a handful of states get to select who gets the presidential nomination for each party?

Why can't they be made to appeal to as many of us as possible to get the darn nomination?

Why wouldn't that get a moderate in office?

Why do I have to keep reading the news?

Why is it when a coworker screws up, I'm always the one spending hours out of my already packed day fixing things? (Well, this time it was me, the C.O.O., and another coworker. None of us initiated the problem, either.)

Why do people think because they screwed up on their planning, didn't attend the class they needed the first 3 times it was offered, are going on vacation instead of attending the class you scheduled when and where you did just for them, they can go "over your head" to get into another, private class offering? One that a competitor is footing the bill for?

Why do so many people think they are so much better or more deserving of special treatment than everyone else?

Why is any of the above my problem?

Why is it when someone sees the Rubix Cube on your desk - even though it has a DON'T YOU DARE! sign on it, even though you have ANOTHER ONE they can touch - they just have to play with the perfect one?

Why do I have to have a perfect one on my desk anyway? (And why do I have to have the messed up one where I can't see it?)

And why is it when someone says "I know what I'm doing" you know you're about to be blown out of the water?

Is it just me?

Last week was a good week, even if I didn't meet all my goals. Here's the SitRep:
2x Arms (2wts), 2x Cardio, 1x Abs, Walk (15 min)
~ Noticed increased arm strength while working on the floors upstairs.
~ Weight still at 165!!! From 171 on 9/10

This week's goals:
2x Arms (2 wts), 3x Cardio, 5x Abs
10 mins daily stretching
Scraping/Sanding floor upstairs

I hate the Legs workout and love the Cardio. Bizarre and so not like me! Since I'm struggling with Legs, I'm going to focus on Cardio. And working on the floors upstairs will work legs some; squatting, stairs, etc.

I frequently find myself watching Ex.treme Mak.eover: Home.Edition on Sunday evenings. No matter how I try to stop myself, I usually find myself being critical. What is up with that? Am I just jealous? But I really wonder how many of these people keep the houses when they're done, or end up "ruining" them just like their previous one.

Yes, I realize that's extremely petty and mean spirited of me. It's not something I'm proud of. But seriously. When they show some of these people and the way they lived before the show. If you're knee deep in clothes and trash, giving you a new house isn't going to change the way you live. Now, I understand that sometimes life gets the better of you and just gets you down to the point where it's just nearly impossible to get up in the morning, much less keep the house clean.

It's just one of those things I wonder about. How are those people in their new houses 3 or 6 or 12 months later? Do they get into financial messes once again? Is the house not kept up just like their last one?

Like last night, I was looking at the house the family was living in. Their youngest child was going through her second round in a fight against cancer. The stress and worry of that, emotionally and financially, has got to be crushing. But the house didn't look that bad to me. Unless it was structurally unsound, why did they have to bull-doze the whole thing? Yes, there was mold on the kitchen floor. Guess they've never heard of bleach. If it's such a big health hazard, did they try to clean it up? Make some effort to fix it? I guess I'm just too critical. Maybe they did and just couldn't get rid of it. The same for the holes in the walls. It's not expensive or time-consuing to fix those. For Pete's Sake - I've done it, and I'm not exactly inclined in that direction. Maybe the house was structurally unsound and they just didn't go into it on the show. I just find myself thinking, they could build 3 or 4 decent homes for what they spend on one, filling it with all these top of the line fancy gadgets, etc.

I cringe when I see them destroying toilets and sinks and cabinets and windows, etc, that are in decent enough shape to be re-used in another home. Especially really old homes. Go online and check out This Old House's web forums; there are always people looking for windows, etc, for their old homes they are trying to restore. I hate the apparent waste of it.

We have a store here in town, called the Re-store, where you can take your old cabinets & sinks, etc. I know quite a few people that have found items there they've re-used. My friend found a corner cabinet with the "Lazy Susan" shelves inside...it fit perfectly in one unused corner of her kitchen. She sanded & painted, and put a new top on it. For a fraction of the cost of a new one, she has a wonderful corner storage unit and counter top. But I guess it's easier - quicker - cheaper - to just demolish. It looks better on TV, too, I guess.

And, of course, first thing I said to myself when they entered the house on last night's episode and they are all ga-ga over the 22 foot high ceilings was "That's going to be a b*&^ch to keep warm in the winter." They do that alot on this show. Big fancy houses with huge spacious rooms and high, high ceilings. I wonder what those heating/cooling bills look like.

Anyway. That's my current uncharitable state of mind. Am I the only one that thinks any of this when watching that show? It's become my weekly test of character. When I find myself with negative thoughts, I try to refocus. Sigh. Why do I do this to myself?

I'm Bored, Can You Tell?

Yes, my blog has changed. I'm a bit bored at work and felt like playing. The old template was wearing thin on me.

You can imagine how hard it is for me to pick a paint color for my house if I get bored after looking at something almost daily for about what, 5 months?

I want to repaint the living room. Only reason I'm not going to is because I'd ruin the nice new floors. :-/

One of those days...

2x Arms (2wts), 2x Cardio, 1x Abs, Walk (15 min)
~ My arms hurt. Can't remember the last time I felt my biceps so much.
~ Down to 165 from 171 on my bathroom scale this morning. Had to look 3x to be sure I was reading it right. Hoo-Yah!

Since my horoscope today says "There is a great deal of momentum building in your mind at this time, and once the dam is opened, you may soon have a gigantic flood on your hands..." I thought I'd spare everyone that painful experience. So here are someone else's thoughts:

Jeff Foxworthy’s comments on Montana

If parking your car for the night involves an extension cord, you might live in Montana.

If you're proud that your state makes the national news primarily because it houses the coldest spot in the nation, you might live in Montana.

If your local Dairy Queen is closed from November through March, you might live in Montana.

If someone in a store offers you assistance, and they don't work there, you might live in Montana.

If you have worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you might live in Montana

If your town has an equal number of bars and churches, you might live in Montana

If you know how to correctly pronounce Butte, you might live in Montana.

If you measure distance in hours, you might live in Montana.

If your family vehicle is a crew cab pickup, you might live in Montana.

If you know several people who have hit deer more than once, you might live in Montana.

If you often switch from "heat" to "a/c" in the same day and back again, you might live in Montana.

If you can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging blizzard, without flinching, you might live in Montana.

If you see people wearing hunting clothes at social events, you might live in Montana.

If you've installed security lights on your house and garage and leave both unlocked, you might live in Montana.

If there are 7 empty cars running in the parking lot at Wal-mart at any given time, you might live in Montana.

If there are more people at work on Christmas Eve day than on Opening Deer Rifle Season, you might live in Montana.

If driving is better in the winter because the potholes are filled with snow, you might live in Montana.

If you know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still winter and road construction, you might live in Montana.

If finding your misplaced car keys involves looking in the ignition, you might live in Montana.

If you find 0 degrees a little chilly, you might live in Montana.

If you actually understand these observations, and you forward them to all your Montana friends, you must live in Montana!

Mission Accomplished

2x Arms (2wts), 2x Cardio, 1x Abs, Walk (15 min)

Talked a coworker into going with me. We had a nice brisk walk up to the school and up and down the street looking for the bus. And then a nice, brisk walk back. I'm adding that to my exercise list. When they say they leave at 2:55, they leave at 2:55. Most of the kids on my little's bus arrived at 2:53-54. I'm not kidding. About 8 of them, en masse, came hurrying up to the bus. My little sister in the middle of 'em. And they pulled out at 2:55p.m. We were across the street. Behind a car. She never saw me. Hah. And so far no cops have come looking for us. ;D

Family Drama and a Recon Mission

Goals: 2x Arms (2 wts), 2x Cardio, 2x Legs, 6x Abs
Sitrep: 2x Arms (2wts-double whimper) 2x Cardio 1xAbs

Stayed home from work this morning (but just "had" to do the responsible thing and come in after lunch. sigh). Was just exhausted from that headache. Didn't do much yesterday after work, either. Ate and did the zombie thing on the couch. Talked to my little sister on the phone around 9pm. She finally got all caught up on her homework (at exactly 8:05pm, she informed me) and took a long shower and had all her stuff (including an outfit) ready for the morning. That's my girl! [g] It was nice to hear her sounding more relaxed - and proud of herself for getting it done. I made sure to tell her how proud I am of her, and how glad, too, that she's caught up and can relax some.

We're having a different issue, now. So far this week she has missed the bus three times. We thought that first day was on purpose, so she could walk to my work. See, ever since she realized her school is only 3 blocks from my office, she's wanted to walk here one day after school. She kept asking, and after the 3rd day in a row of her asking followed by me asking what was going on, I finally got her to admit something was up. She doesn't like the bus driver. The second or third day of school, he yelled or lectured (not sure which) at her when she got to the bus, saying she was late. She insists she wasn't late. I'm afraid she probably argued with him. She's not quiet, my little sister.

Anyway. Her step-mom picks up the sister at the high school across the street from my work, about 30 minutes after the middle school gets out. So after some phone calls we get her picked up. At least she called me before walking to my work, and I told her to come here (thinking it would be more convenient for her stepmom as it's closer.) Her stepmom wasn't thrilled. But then, we all thought she'd done it on purpose, even though we'd told her that she had to take the bus home that day. But on Tuesday she called me again, saying she'd missed the bus. But she called me at 3pm on the dot both days. The bus is scheduled to leave at 3:05pm. So her mom called the school and what do you know, they changed the departure time to 2:55pm.

But yesterday after school, she missed it again. This time she swore she and another student got to the bus at 2:55pm. He honked at them and drove away. Oooookay. Now, my little is not one to lie or make up stories. Yes, she's capable of it, but she doesn't tend to do this. Plus, she's not very good at it when she has tried, and knows that. However, I'm not sure exactly what's going on, you know?

And then this morning. They live out in the valley, and are attending schools not in their "district." So she and her older sister take 2 buses. One that picks them up near their house, and the second one that "transfers" them to the schools they are attending. The second bus is the same driver as Shanni's after-school bus. This morning, when they got to the school where they transfer, he pulled away right as they got there. So they chased him a block down the street until he pulled over and let them on. Both kids are telling the same story, along with a third child that was on the same bus. I'm not sure exactly who is at fault to tell you the truth.

But my little's mom is mad. You might even say she's on the warpath. I, for one, am not standing in her way and am accepting any and all assignments as they come. ;) Which is why in about forty minutes, I'm taking my afternoon break and am walking up to the middle school to do some reconnaisance. ;) I'm to find out exactly what time that bus actually leaves. Without my little seeing me. Riiiiiight.

Aimless

Goals: 2x Arms (2 wts), 2x Legs, 2x Cardio, 6x Abs
Sitrep: 1x Arms (2 wts - whimper), 1x Cardio, 1x Abs

Not feeling particularly witty or amusing today. More's the pity. Aimless pretty well covers it. I am Tired. Not sure why. I think it's what I'm eating this week. Had pizza one night...and peanut butter a few times. Sigh.

Have a headache this afternoon. Ate a mini-package of peanut M&M's and within 15 minutes had that migraine aura stuff going on. I'd been feeling down, and thought I might be getting a headache (couldn't get my hands warm & had purple fingernails). Guess the peanuts were the last straw! Took some sudafed (sinuses are packed again) and put my head down for a nap during lunch. Aura went away, and no migraine so far. Just a headache. But that's twice in about a week when I don't usually get migraine auras at all. Maybe once a year, if that? I have a feeling the infection is in my sinuses now. Finally bought the Neil Med Sinus Rinse kit, but I can't use it - yet. Says, clear as a bell, not to use if you have an ear infection. Peachy. {sigh} Have to go back to the doc this week any way and have my ears checked.

I dreamt a lot last night. I wish I could remember it. I sort-of woke up mid-dream, and thought to myself "Must remember this...would make a great blog entry." Naturally, I don't remember a bit of it. Just that it was funny and bizarre.

Ah, well.

So I've been struggling with my little sister and homework this year. Yes, I know, school's only been in maybe a month. Maybe I'm overreacting and she just needs to settle in. I've helped her organize, and we studied together last Saturday. Maybe we'll make that a regular part of our time together. Study for an hour or two, and then do something fun. :) She sounded exhausted this afternoon. Poor kid. Growing up really bites. Got some good advice from some ladies on the BB. I'll try not to panic/overreact and see how she adjusts.

Learned something this week. When trying to turn the gas back on to the heater, don't use a hammer to "finesse" the handle past the point it gets stuck. 'Cause they don't like finesse and break. Stupid old metal pipe. What's worse, the gas is still off and I can't light that heater. It's the one I rely on to heat the back porch/laundry room and the kitchen. So I'm reduced to using the baseboard heater at night in the kitchen. Pfffbbbt. Now I've gotta find someone to help me fix that this weekend.

Note to self: NO HAMMERS unless nails are involved. Oh, and don't forget protective head gear.

When Good Authors Go Bad - or Seem To

Goals: 2x Legs, 2x Cardio, 2x Arms (2 wts), 6x Abs
Sitrep: 1x Arms (2 wts)

Adding that 2nd weight to arms was tougher than I thought...especially considering I was doing arms w/2 weights easy earlier this year. Soooo...I've decided that amping up abs at the same time is asking for trouble...So the abs are staying at 6x Abs beginner workout. My biceps are starting to feel a little sore/shaky this moring. [g]

Now for the book report: Maybe I'm just a picky reader...okay, let's rephrase. I am a picky reader. Last Friday I was doing my monthly grocery shopping and decided to pick up a book. One of my favorite authors is Brenda Joyce, and the latest book in the De Warenne dynasty has been out for awhile. I've been saving it for a book-slump. And frankly, have not been in the mood to read fiction since Suz' book came out in August. She (and Joyce) are those types of author's I have to switch to non-fiction after reading their books. They spoil me for other authors. I saw that the second book in Brenda Joyce's "Masters of Time" series was out. Now, B.J. is one of those authors that has a bunch of stuff going on. She writes the Francesca Cahill novels (the Deadly series) that I really, really, really like. It's a very talented writer that can change the Hero from book one to a different guy, and make me like him more! I resisted, of course, but now I'm glad I gave in.

She does a really good job of developing characters and the relationship and emotions between the Hero & Heroine. And she does a fabulous job in my opinion of building the romantic/sexual tension as well. It's hard not to get invested in the characters. You get drawn in.

So, although I'm not a big fan of books with time travel and special warriors of the gods/goddesses, I decided to give this one a try. [I've tried the J.R. Ward series - didn't even finish one.] After all, it's a Brenda Joyce book, and they're medieval Scottish warriors. And with a 2nd B.J. book to read after it, it wouldn't be that bad. Well. Consider this a "Good Authors Gone Bad" warning. Okay, I'm being too harsh. Once I got into the book, it was good, the usual characterization did finally appear. Once she got away from several things:

1. Oversexed hero (she uses that term quite a few times! What the heck does that mean? To me, I'm thinking "all used up". But I guess that's not the definition of the word.)
2. Larger than life in all respects (trying to be PG here) hero
3. Supposedly fabulous, best sex ever and the hero knows it and is a smug s.o.b.
4. Heroine that falls in love with hero because of said better-than-chocolate & books & everything-else-in-the-known universe sex and willingly gives all up (including her comfy rich 21st century life) to travel through time to 1430 Scotland for said hero after knowing him all of two seconds!

Maybe it's me. But when authors describe these types of heroes, it's a turn-off. I mean, absolute perfection. Huge, buff bodies, always described as "golden gods" and so on. And then the sex is supposed to be so mind-blowing, and the attraction so overwhelming they fall into bed within seconds...All I could see is one of those muscle-men competitions, with the not-natural steroid-induced muscles. The kind that usually make me go "gross". And in the rush to follow this new trend of the almighty warrior, B.J. didn't get the usual characterization in first. The development of the sexual attraction and emotional attraction wasn't developed. It was this paltry description of "golden, god-like, warrior, oversexed" and poof. They're in bed. Even though demons are coming out of the fabric of time to kill her, he leaps through time with her (not something she's ever done or known was possible before) and dumps her somewhere unconscious and alone, and then shows up 24 hours later. None of this matters when she sees him again. Huh. Things like this bother me. The sex, okay, I can understand being overcome and falling into bed. But I didn't get the basis for the rest of it? No rational person would do this. But then, maybe that's just me. [g]

I ended up skipping ahead in the book, and read the last 1/3 of it first. Sad, but true, and not something I've ever done with one of her books before. By that point, she'd gotten away from that aspect of the story, and had actually started into her usual flow of things. The characters, the emotions, the plot-line was more solid. I was actually a little teary near the end. So I went back on Saturday and read the front part of the book. Once I got past the stereo-typical warrior/god stuff, it was good.

I doubt I'll be reading the rest of the series. But it was okay. And it did have an interesting tie-up to the time travel bit. (I always have a problem with people going back in time and staying. I can see going forward as your DNA line, parents, etc, have lived. But I have a hard time with people being able to exist before their parents. How is that physically possible? But I digress.)

To make this post even longer, on Sunday morning I picked up the other book by Joyce, The Perfect Bride and ended up reading it all day. Seriously. My intention (it was only 8am) was to read about an hour and then exercise (I'd just eaten breakfast) and then start on my chores/plans for the day. I stopped somewhere in the afternoon when my sister called. Only because I hadn't talked to her in at least a month and they're going on vacation this week so I won't have a chance for a bit to talk to her. As soon as we got off the phone I picked the book up again. Finished it around 5pm. It was good. Probably one of my favorite books, and not just by her. I loved the hero/heroine. I loved the issue facing them, and...it was just a really good book. I think I like it better than the last few Suz Brockmann books, to tell you the truth. Only issue was the resolution of the issue. It was tied up just a teensy bit fast, but not in a bad way. I'd've like a little more in-depth on it. The last few scenes probably weren't needed...but they were nice.

But I'd better stop now. This has been a very long post!

The Black Hole of Time

To my Brother & Sister-in-Law

May you have warm words on a cold evening,
A full moon on a dark night,
And the road downhill all the way to your door.

Goals: 2x Arms, 2x Legs, 2x Cardio, Daily Abs
Sitrep: 2x Arms, 2x Legs, 1x Cardio, 5x Abs

Goals (10/1-7): 2x Arms (2 weights), 2x Legs, 2x Cardio, 6x Abs (Intermediate)

It's hard to believe that my brother and sister-in-law have been married for eleven years today. Sometimes I look around myself and feel a little bit like Rip Van Winkle. Or like I've been swallowed by some black hole of time. I blink, and seasons pass.

Or I pick up a book and that's the end of that!